How I learned to stop caring,

And stop reading pitchfork.

I've had it. I only spent maybe 5 minutes looking at pitchfork. That was five minutes wasted.

I'm cranky and here's a symptom. Regardless of whether or not taking the beatles music and mashing it up for french-ish contortionists in the Le Circ is a good idea or not, here's the 2nd paragraph:

"Glass Onion" was Lennon having fun with the Beatles myth, referencing his earlier songs and mocking the tendency to "decode" them that would eventually get way out of hand when Beach Boys pal and "Never Learn Not to Love" composer Charles Manson sent his minions into Beverly Hills to commit mass murder. "Glass Onion" was Lennon's attempt-- on the fly, while the band was at its peak-- at recontextualizing his Beatles work, to remind us all that music is supposed to be fun. The joker was laughing with us, jabbing an elbow in our sides to say, "Hey, we're just a pop band here, folks."

You silly, silly person. If you'd ever done any research AT ALL, instead of just remembering there's some connection between manson and the white album you might look up something snd find out that the White Album was the catalyst for manson to go off the reservation - AND you'd find that the song "Glass Onion" was in fact, ON the fucking White Album. One might even say that there are grooves on the vinyl disc that when played at 33 and precisely 1/3 revolutions per minute sounds mimicing the song Glass Onion would issue forth. Like tissue paper from a spastic cash machine.

I want my five minutes back.

Update: I'm a big loser - the paragraph says eventually get out of hand with manson. i missed that. Note to self - take some remedial reading comprehension courses at the local middle school. grade: amateur. Sorry about the outburst.

More Corporate Thieving, Compliments of Microsoft.

Apple Matters | Zune Marketplace's Absurd Pricing Scheme

So, the Zune is out and making all kinds of waves. I checked it out myself and wasn't really interested for a variety of reasons, namely because I could give a f**k about sharing music that I'm not allowed to own with friends when that music will expire in three days (which is one of the 'great' unique features Zune boasts), etc, etc. I represent the kind of consumer that doesn't own an MP3 player so that I can use it as a 'magic key' to somebody's online music store- I just want to put music on the thing (music that I own, music that I can transfer to ANY device).

Now, I have to say that I do not take sides on the whole 'Apple vs. Microsoft' battle-royale. Personally, I dig the iPod- I use it, I love it, BUT I have never once used the iTunes Music Store- not once. I mean hey, let's face it, if I wanted to load up my 'Pod' with 20,000 songs from iTunes MS (at $.99 a song), it would cost me roughly $20,000, wouldn't it? So, I'm not really into online music stores as a rule anyway, no matter who's counting the cash. That being said, I have to dog on Microsoft's new online endeavor (that's linked to the new Zune media player) a little anyway.

I'm a little put out by something I read recently about Zune Marketplace's use of a 'points system' in place of currency for buying songs. This is supposed to be so that XBOX Live users can win points (and for a few other reasons that seem largely inconsequential to me), but the whole equation comes out very shifty because there isn't an exact 1:1 correlation between dollars (or cents) and points. Microsoft forces you to buy points at a minimum of $5 blocks ($5 = 400 points) and their songs (which are 79 points each) come out to be like 98.75 cents per song. This is great right? Cheaper than iTune's 99 cents per song right? Well, sort of, unless you take into account that you have to keep buying in $5 blocks if you hope to ever break even.

You see, Microsoft essentially gets to pocket the inevitable left-overs because it's not 'real' money there in your account- you bought 'points' not 'songs'- end of transaction. So, unless you make it your personal mission to use all your remaining points up, which entails buying more and more and more points at a minimum of $5 each purchase, you'll never get as much music as you actually paid for- so are you really saving money when you're forced to spend more to get your money's worth? Not only that, but until you spend up all your extra points (which is undoubtedly an endlessly futile thing to attempt), Microsoft gets to use your unspent change as an interest-free loan.

And, in case anyone is wondering about how much purchasing you'd have to do at Zune Marketplace to use up ALL the money that you paid in, the only way that you could break even (without actually losing money) is to buy music in increments of 31,600 points ($5 = 400 points, 79 points = 1 song, and 31,600 is the LCM of 79 and 400). That means to get back ALL of your money, you are forced to buy 400 songs, which will cost you $395.

What a deal!?!

Ugata Heardis

Some highschool friends that I recently got in touch with have a neat thing going on. They call it the Ugata Heardis project. So far there have been 2 complete rounds with the third round in progress.

The way it works is that you

• have a list of cats who are "in" for the round.
• Each cat who is in gets a list of the names and addresses of the other cats who are also in.
• Then, you serve up a mix cd or double gatefold mix epic of songs and audio that you feel your peers just MUST be exposed to. Hence the name : Ugata Heardis.
• Then, if there are 6 cats who are in you make 5 copies of the disc(s) {6 minus your self = 5} and send them out to the peers.
  
• After a while a survey is emailed out to the peers from a co-ordinator where you vote for your favorite tracks from
• Each album that you didn't submit
  
• Your favorite tracks over all that you didn't submit.
• The co-ordinator then tallies up the results of the most popular tracks over all and you get to see which songs from your mix were favorites.

There are a couple of minor sub rules such as, no more than 2 tracks from one artists (the project is about exposure and breadth, rather than say making a mix and the last half be the B-side to Tattoo You. No matter how tempting that might be.

It's really a great idea. I love making mixes and I love the veritable avalanche of new music that you get. And it's great to hear other folks exercise their mix/dj skills. Most folks theme a mix and then the cover art can get off the hook. It's good times. This last round that i've joined in on has a sub-theme: Running Blind. Which means you send out the mix to be appreciated WITHOUT a track list. then, 2 weeks later you let the folks in on the secret of the artist and track names. So, if you REALLY want your peers to appreciate the suble colors of your pat boones and perry coumos, or your insistence that Tuvan throat singing is far and away inferior to Tibetan throat singing - you can. You can torture or show mercy.

I've already received a set in the mail One entitled Black Black and is a batch of industrial assaults that attempt to burn my face chemically. the other is Strawberry Pocky - which is chocked full of cartoon, raymond scott style musics, and some actual standup comic bits, with a sugar coating of Pop Songs. what fun.

Spread the culture of the Ugata Project. It is unseemingly tasty. It is, yea, unwholesome in it's delights.

Mr. Inflation/greed, meet Mr. Emusic,

Sope.

Emusic is changing the way they price stuff out. They gave us paying customers a heads up and said: "You'll be grandfathered in, at the same rate charge per download, but if you bail and comeback the deal won't be so sweet." That's pretty fair when you raise rates, as rate raises go. Of course they then reminded that you can bump up to a higher price and if you pay annually you'll get the maximum value but.

But. That's just it. I'm getting 65 downloads a month from them...I tend to burn them all up in one binge, so i'm always coveting more albums than i can fit in in a month, but here's the REAL rub. 65 tracks is JUST about all i can bring into my stable and process and give a good listen to and evaluate and be cheered by, or depressed by in a month. Frugality dictates that I stay nice and safe where I'm at. but the spendy part of me screams "VALUE!" at about 120 inner decibels, or indebs.

I'm torn, i'm NOT torn. I am in the words of Abraham Van Helsing, last night during Coppola's homage to "the Shining"'s torrents of blood, Un-Torn. caught between caring and not caring.

-Dr. Confusion
+++++
A quick shout-out to Myku who has been a posting whirlwind here and at his spot. The internets are enriched by your efforts.

MySpace, 'Hustlin'

MySpace to block illegal use of copyright music | CNET News.com

So MySpace is finally 'putting it's foot down,' implementing new technology that will allow them to stop users from posting unauthorized copyright music. Supposedly, they've been getting flack from some of the 'giganto' record companies (and who hasn't) and have decided to cave to the pressure.

This may be more strategic than it seems, though, considering MySpace aims to eventually offer copyright-protected songs from major record companies, and will soon begin selling songs from nearly 3 million unsigned bands. Really quite an ambitious move, if you ask me:

1. Oust the 'music pirates' and appease the major record labels, cleaning-up your image in the process

2. Make deals with said labels to distribute their music on MySpace now that 'everybody's friends again'

3. Begin capitalizing on all the independantly produced music being distributed by the many bands who use MySpace

4. Bask in the glow of an ever-expanding empire

Smart stuff, MySpace. I just hope that those who've been posting their own original music for free will be allowed to continue if they so desire.......

The Record Industry Loves You (and Other Such Bulls#*t)

The Problem With Music

For all those hopeful rock gods and goddesses out there, dreaming of striking it rich in the music industry as soon as the right chance comes along for your exemplary vision to be recognized and appreciated by the 'powers that be' at some monolith gargantua of a record-label, this article, from Maximum Rock n' Roll #133, written by Steve Albini may just scare the buh-jesus out of you (or at least make you want to trash a hotel room like your heroes do). The article, a staunchly pessimistic trip down a rabbit-hole filled with broken promises and cremated dreams, details the problems encountered by newly 'signed' artists when dealing with a major label.

Pay close attention to the run-down of how much the artists actually walk away with after all is said and done. And record companies have freakin' nerve to push that morality-button and say that 'every time you illegally download music online, you're stealing money from the artists.' How can you steal money from them that's already been stolen?

In short, record companies are evil (unless one wants to sign me).

Tom Waits: Father to 56 Orphans

Tom Waits has put out a 3 CD, 56 song collection of new and archived material called "Orphans: Brawlers, Bawlers & Bastards" on Anti, and I for one think the world could do worse than a little extra Tom Waits.........

There's a great write-up about "Orphans" by Waits on the page as well.

ANTI- Album - Orphans

Laurie Anderson

I just spent the better part of one of my classes huddled around a computer with the teacher and a few other students digging for and watching clips of Laurie Anderson performances online. I believe this was kicked-off by our professor musing over Anderson being the first and only artist in residence employed by NASA.

An unlikely duo, or a match made in heaven? (really, no pun intended)

For Those About to Mix.......

Booyah!

It's never too late to start treatin' yourself right with some free music. I just came across Basic.ch, a site that boasts internet radio as well as live & archived dj mixes. The archives actually look quite huge too...... Wicked.

Religion IS Marquee Moon

I was driving just now, from West Seattle, back up to Ballard.

It's been cold and foggy and at night the West Seattle/99 stretch of highway is all container ports, those big cranes, the piers into the harbor, the black black, forever black of the bay - then there was the low clouds covering up half the tall buildings down town. Very awesome visually.

To top it off, i had put in Marquee Moon, and cued up the track Marquee Moon and set about to driving in that very intense, careful way that I do. And I swear, as the sodium lights were streaking by, and the flat black of the harbor was on my left. I had a religious experience. Not the kind where you've got the music on, and the lights are wonderfull and then God starts talking to you. Nope. Mine is where the visuals are happnin' and the spectacular, spare, and complicated, emotional music that was on 9 or 10 on the volume dial IS religion. God doesn't speak to or through Tom Verlaine during that song. God takes notes. God says "Oh."

Curtis Mayfield tells us if there's a hell below, we all gonna go. Well, i guess that makes the blapheming alright then. Keep my seat warm, Curtis.

-Dr. Confusion

First Impressions

This. new. record. is. awesome.

some how cozier than the prev. A little more "studio" sounding than bright ideas. Put it SAT -ways and it's

Meet the beatles : Bright ideas :: Revolver : Be Still Please

At the same time it feels, sonically more expansive. And the songs. man. the songs sound, well - they sound all grown up. The progressions are intricate and the melodies are sure footed and poignant. and it all sounds very thoughtful. My God. this is an excellent album so far. Buy it.

How to treat a brother right,

Y'all remember when I was thrilled about the Portastatic pre-order?

Well. The record just fell into my mailbox. That is they way to brighten a day. They loaded me up y'allz. I got:

• An invoice with a sweet sharpie scrawled "61" letting Merge know I wanted the hot mess. (w00t!)
  
• A new streamlined Merge sticker
• A Portastatic post-card for "Who Loves The Sun"
• A Be Still Please poster with Mac getting some wave action
• The Some Small Things You Can't Defend demo CD inscribed by the man himself. You can bathe in the silver sharpied handwritten glory below:

(The underscore lets you know that this is indeed, Mac! who is dropping the science on the unwashed masses, without the need for punctuation, for punctuation is a brute's tool.)

• And finally , the Be Still Please album itself.

For the grand total of $13.00 American. And I got it, all the way across the Continent 3 business days before that record drops en la tiendas. That, young scholars all, is how you win and keep a customer, and turn him into something unwholesome in his enthusiasm.

I'm speechless.
And I'm Out.

A Little Shout to the Wolf Parade

Hot Dizzam!!!

Why is Wolf Parade straight rockin' my dirt marble recently???!!!! For some reason, I didn't think that much of them when I first heard their stuff, but I'm slowly becoming a true believer. They are bombs, ya'll.

BTW, I first heard them @ Sub Pop's site (see 'Free (legit!) Music' for link).......

Yo La Tengo's I am not afraid of you and I will beat your ass

Ok killahs,
I just listened to the first three minutes of the TEN MINUTE(!), FORTY SEVEN(!) second album opener of Yo La Tengo's New Record. And lord god, it has given me sensations that would call for quinine and last rights were I reclining in the darkest Congo, not in a crumpled office chair in a mole-fart stagnant media basement. Typing furiously, as if this were my last actions on this earth.

With all deliberate speed listen to this album and support this band! I cannot underline this enough, even if I owned all the quills in cornwall, let alone, east anglia.

***

[update] - the party don't stop. the slaying track in question can be obtained, coveted and polished from obsessive rubbing, for FREE - on the up and up, courtesy matador records here. (direct .mp3 download link)

Ghostface and portastatic

I kna he's a RIAA artist and all, but DAMN! Fishscale just keeps bangin' and bangin'. That record doesn't ever stop. Why am I such a philistine that I don't really like listening to late 60's - 70's soul - but if Ghost samples some i'm like, "Thats my JAM, right there!" and it's SO good?

Ghostface official website @ defjam.com

***

Also - i don't know if there's time but: Mac and the portastatic are making a new record and if you get in on the 1st 100 pre-orders, they give you a bonus disc for free. Dope.

**
Also, Also - my flaming lips exposure is limited to : Soft Bulletin. But if I had a florin or a gilder for each time i played the record, OR if I had a half-pence for each time i played a TRACK off that record - I would line the streets of walterboro with such precious onyx and jasper that the sun itself would have to set out of envy.

About Me, School, and the Jelly She Don't Use….

The News:

Ok, so I'm sure our millions of readers have been wondering what in the h-e-double-hockey sticks happened to me. Well, I recently moved to Columbia, SC and started at the U of SC as a studio art major. Thanks, BTW, to Mr. Dr. Confusion for so aptly and sentimentally presenting this news to the rest of cyberspace.

Anyway, aside from being busy with school and the wife and staying up pretty much all night every night painting, I've been listening to loads of music. And, let's talk about that because, after all, that's why we're here, mammal.

Down To Bidness:

I was walking to school today, with the MP3 on shuffle, when "Chewin the Apple of Your Eye" came on. Now this is a very cool little acoustic-low fi type thing that sits right around the middle of The Flaming Lips' album Transmissions from the Satellite Heart, and breaks up the record great. It got me thinking about how I'd heard "She Don't Use Jelly" back when it came out (around '97, I think??). I remember hating that song and thinking that The Flaming Lips were just another idiot, no-talent band trying to skate in on the corporate side of the then new musical genre called 'alternative.' For some reason, the song just rubbed me the wrong way.

Of course, I'd never heard of the band at that time and so didn't have the affection toward their music that I do now- This left me wondering how much of my change in attitude (regarding "She Don't Use Jelly" specifically) was contextual and how much reflected my now different musical outlook. To state things more clearly: did my tastes change so dramatically, or did I simply accept The Flaming Lips' silly little ditty as a 'classic' after having been exposed to so many (other) masterworks by the group? I mean, how differently do we view individual works by an artist when we have other works by that same artist to compare them to? I think it often makes a difference to me, as I seem to be willing to cut more slack to artists that I respect when they come up with a silly or a lower standard piece of work.

This is not to say that I consider "She Don't Use Jelly" to be a lower standard work, but when you hear it by itself does it wreak of brilliance? What if I'd heard Transmissions from the Satellite Heart and it had sucked? What if "She Don't Use Jelly" had been the best thing, hands down, on the album? What then? Would I have said, yeah, The Flaming Lips, I was right about them……they S-U-C-K!.......(I'm stickin' with Nirvana.)

Makes you think, or at least, it does me. I need to go through my record collection and try to see some of the music I listen to with new eyes (or new ears, rather)- Shuffle is good for that. It also makes me think how you can develop a 'personal' kind of relationship with an artist over time and exposure to a greater bulk of their work, and through this relationship, begin to view their works with a sort of knowing 'familiarity,' a familiarity that turns a song like "She Don't Use Jelly" into a kind of inside joke that (maybe) only Flaming Lips fans can get.

And, to answer the question, is the song good by itself? I can only answer with that most popular addage, "I don't know if it's art, but I like it!" Pick up a copy of Transmissions from the Satellite Heart and decide for yourself *plug plug*.

Synth 1

Since I last looked at Synth 1 it has gotten a new updated version. It still looks the same, but it seems more stable with my fruity loops installation. Which is good, cause Synth 1 comes highly reccomended. I don't think it has crystal synth beat in terms of sound design possibilities. But it is rockin none the less. No need to buy any lead synth, or Moog knockoffs... you can just use crytal synth and synth 1.

Thanks! Mr genius Japanese Synth maker.

Synth 1 - in all its bewildering question marks and japanese carachters.

A Happy, Happy Doggone Day

Today is a great day.

Today is a day that I'm damn proud.

Today, is the 1st day of Myku's new schooling. He's starting up Art School, after basically living and breathing Art School since he was, what? 3 years old?

I was proud before. Now, I'm more proud.

To celebrate, i'm taking tomorrow off to play some guitar, and hopefully write a song. I'm just putting the whole lyric/idea notion on the shelf. Cause it's keeping me from writing stuff. So i'm just gonna focus on writing some music, and we'll see how that goes.

So godspeed and good luck, M. I'm so damn happy I could bust.

Songs in the air,

Since it's been too long since i've posted anything. Here's a run down of the music that keeps getting played from speakers that i'm ever near.

The Constantines:
A mix of Shine a Light and Tournament of Hearts, esp.

• Draw Us Lines
• Young Lions (video here.)
  
• Soon Enough
• Working Full Time
• On To You

Yo La Tengo's

• Fakebook
• Painful
• I can hear the heart beating as one

Recent crew mixes such as the "just married mix", "flight plan", my own Ugata Heardis contribution. and Zach's Ugata mix which is a thing of majesty.

And almost religously:
Willie Nelson's

• Teatro

Which really people, deserves it's own Wikipedia entry. I should get right on that - as soon as I learn anything about that record. It is just SO good.

What's being played at your spot?

The Constantines Rebuttal Rebuttal Re..... oh Whatever.....

Yeah.

I sort of read that write up of the show and was wondering if I'd missed something. However, as I usually DO miss something, I just kept my pie hole shut. :)

Oh, um, stirring things up again.......

I really like Chad VanGaalen. I hope he didn't ruin the Constantines show, but I have his "Infiniheart" album and it's pretty sweet.

The article IS, in my opinion, a little lacking concerning the actual performance by the Constantines, though. Not enough coverage/info for my tastes, considering that's what the article's supposed to be about.

-Love,
.m